What Are You Grateful For?

The other night Karah and Bradley stayed up late. They played horses with each other, wrestled, and laughed. I was overwhelmed with such feelings of love and gratitude for the children that we have been blessed with. I took a few snapshots to try and capture these feelings. So while I am at it - why don't you tell us what YOU are grateful for?

I am Grateful for My children

Yesterday I had planned to go to Branson for the day with my friend Courtney. We were going to bring Bryce along so Tom could get yard work done and not have to deal with all three of the monkeys. As I was getting ready to leave, he said,"Why don't you leave Bryce here with me? You guys will have more fun if you aren't having to worry about the baby and there is no sense in messing up his routine. Leave him where he will be more comfortable. He will be good for me - don't worry."
We took his suggestion and enjoyed a girls day of shopping and lunch while Tom sacrificed and took care of things back home.

I am Grateful for my Best Friend, Tommy T

I am so blessed with such a loving husband. I get so excited when I hear the garage door go up at the end of the day - knowing he is back from work. He treats me and the kids with such kindness and respect and always makes sure that we know we are his priority. Even on vacation he brought me flowers when he ran out to the store to grab a few things we had forgotten. He takes no vacations from loving us. He is such an incredible man and I consider myself blessed that he would have me as his.

It is fun to know that even though the kids will grow older and move on to have families of their own - we will always have each other. There is nothing I like more than being with him, laughing with him, and sharing my life with him.

So, sorry for the sudden love fest - but sometimes a girl just has to get it out!

So what are you grateful for?????

Can't wait to read about it!

Double Date to the Derby

Tommy T and I have continued our tradition of going to the demolition derby Bi-Annually. August 16 was the big night. We thought we would get "gussied up" - redneck style for our romantic evening out. We planned a double date with John and Shannon. We thought we would be more sure to pull off "authentic redneck" if John was with us. Shannon and I ratted out our hair - and wore trashy shirts. We thought tattoos would also be appropriate. It's all about fitting in.

Tommy T let me put a tattoo on the back of his neck - not knowing what it was. I think others were baffled at this big guy with such a sweet, feminine tattoo.

John thought it would be more "dramatic" if he put an entire sheet of tattoos on his arm. Unfortunately, they were all hearts, fairies, stardust, and intimidating things like that. It formed a perfect rectangle - to make it more believable.

I was a classy redneck. My tattoos were more traditional.

We decided if we were going redneck - we had to eat redneck. The Sizzler it was. When we entered, they treated us like VIPs. They were so excited that someone was there to eat. 3/4 of the menu was whited out - they said they were "all out" of those items (aka they spoiled because of no business). John showed his reverence for the Sizzler by removing his hat.

We all ordered the same steak - except when they came out - they were all different sizes and shapes. I asked the manager about it. "We all ordered the same thing but......" she interrupted, "Yes, I know, they are the same steaks - they are just different shapes - they come that way." I thought I was going to choke I was laughing so hard. Tommy T HAD varied and ordered the Filet Mignon. It was LITERALLY a 2 inch diameter. He said "I could cough up more than that".

A brief recap of the shirts. Shannon's said "Mood Swings in 6 seconds" John went with a traditional T shirt with the arms cut off. He also mowed the lawn in it right before he came - so it smelled authentic as well. Yes, that is a Miller Lite hat with a bottle opener on the rim.My shirt said "SuperGirl" and had a fake rose tattoo on the sleeve. Tom went ultra white trash with a Pepsi hat and a shirt that said "Who's Your Daddy?" This chick was directing traffic in her glow in the dark shirt and knee high WWF Boots. And that car was NOT in the derby - he was there to watch. What is more redneck than carrying around a piece of turkey carcass and gnawing it off the bone?

This little sweetie dressed up for the derby. I thought it was cute.

Oh, yes - and then there was the man sitting next to us who pulled a baby RA-FREAKIN-COON out of his shirt in the middle of the derby. The Coon's name is Roscoe. He has a "bit-o-honey" in his mouth and his teeth are stuck together. He was captured when he was a newborn. They had definitely bonded with each other. There was a lot cuddling and even some open mouth kissing. The derby wasn't as exciting as usual - but the costumes and the coon made up for it.

He Keeps Coming Back!

Gunther and I have had a strained relationship for about 6 years. Who is Gunther? My three legged Yorkie. Yes... 3 legs. In 2001, I thought I would "surprise" Tommy T with a dog. What did I do? What any person who is uneducated in the dog market would do. I looked in the paper and found a little old lady living in a trailer park who had an adult, dog breeding, meth using, son living with her. I made an appointment to check out the pups in the 100 degree, fly infested trailer. I ignored the happy puppy's and went for the dejected, sick looking one - all out of pity. I put him in the front pocket of my overalls (they were KIND OF still OK to wear at that time) and brought him home to Tommy T.

Had I known what I know now - instead of yelling "Surprise!" I would have said something like this:

"Surprise! I just paid a $200 "deposit" on a dog that we will end up spending thousands of dollars on in medical bills!

• He will give us love for two years and then turn his back on us as soon as we have children.



• He will roll in the grass and poop on the sidewalk.


• His urine will eat the paint off of our deck.



• He will be allergic to every known dog food and suffer chronic ear infections due to his allergies.



• He will poop in your truck every time you take him to the vet because of his anxiety.



• He will eat watermelon and have his face swell up like a balloon.


• He will DEMAND that you rub his chest with your toes -whenever you are in a seated position.


• He will eat a pork chop bone that will puncture his intestines - causing an emergency trip to the vet.



• He will accidentally be drug on a leash behind the back of a bicycle - ripping his leg open.



• We will pay hundreds of dollars to have him treated only to have his tendons fuse together - rendering his use of only three legs.



• He will be banned from all groomers because of his obnoxious yap - and when a grommer finally accepts him - she will put him in a drug induced state.



• He will get worms while we are on vacation.



• He will snort like a pig when he gets excited - until he starts couging and hacking.



• He will snip at our children when he gets older.



• He will always get loose and run away - and he will ALWAYS BE RETURNED.



• He will grow old and be chronically ill- but he will never die. He is your eternal pup. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!"

Well, Gunther escaped again this week. This time he was gone overnight. I felt horrible because Tommy T was driving the neighborhood well into the night searching for this pup that he still manages to love. Out of love for HIM and NOT the dog - I called the area pounds the following day.

Me: "Yes, I was calling to see if our dog was found"

Lady: "Sure - what is the breed"

Me: "He's a yorkie who only uses three legs"

Lady: "A three legged yorkie?" (disgusted)

Me: (started laughing so hard I had to hand the phone to Tom)

Tom rushed over to ID the three legged yorkie. I was sure that there weren't many of them skipping around in our community - I KNEW it was him. Sure enough - we got to PAY money to receive him back into our lives.

He has an internal boomerang. Our other Yorkie, Gracie, whom we bought from a real life BREEDER, not a puppy mill - was ticked off when he came back. She would again be bunking with her white trash comrade.

Tom and I wrote an anthem for him, years ago. If you are LDS, it is sung to the tune of "High On A Mountain Top"

Enjoy the lyrics:

"High on a mountain top - a bald dog is unfurled,

Ye nations now look up to the pup who rules the world.

He thinks he is so bad - but we all know the truth -

He is a little, fat, dog who is SO rude.

His bark makes the deaf man hear because it is so loud

He loves to poop on the floor- especially in front of a crowd-

He pees at will - all over the ground

And that is the reason why he's going to the pound!"

He eventually did. But he came back.

I need to come to terms with this. I need to muster up some love for this pup - because it appears that we are going to be with him for a very long time. We need couples therapy. I used to have some serious love for this pup. Can it be rekindled? I will keep you posted!

In the meantime I would like to echo the sentiments in an ad that was in our local paper:

"FREE TO A GOOD HOME OR A BAD HOME...............

I WILL DELIVER"

Parenting Advice Needed

Have any of you ever made a parenting mistake with long term consequences? Well, I did and I now am in a quandary and could use some practical advice from any veteran parents or even those with no children - but with good ideas.

Let me give you the background.

A couple of months ago, Karah was going through the stage where she thought she needed an entire roll of paper in order to wipe herself clean. One night she stuffed and flooded the toilet. This is where my bad parenting crept in.

"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Karah! Karah! What did you do? Get a towel! Get a towel! I thought I told you NOT to use huge wads of toilet paper! What a mess! Dang it! Karah!"

Well, ever since then she has been freaked out by flushing paper. I will walk in the bathroom and find "a deed" - and a wad of toilet paper on the floor -next to the toilet. This is making me NUTS! Not only is it disgusting - it is unsanitary and I have a baby crawling around - exploring the world with his mouth. This is one discovery he does NOT need to be making.

I have tried EVERYTHING with her to get this to stop - to no avail. Help!!!

While you're at it - solve this one. Bradley has the same fear of flushing - but I am NOT finding any wads of TP after HE goes. Which is nastier? Any great butt wiping incentives out there?

Reward for the advice that works!

First Day of First Grade

August 18th, it was back to school time.

I loved the first day of school because I didn't have to drag Karah out of bed. She was SO excited for 1st grade that she practically woke up skipping. Um.....why are they in OUR bed????


Her favorite breakfast (Yogurt, Berry, Granola Parfait and cinnamon toast) and off to brush her teeth and do her hair. Bradley even joined in the action.

1st Day of 1st Grade cheesin'!

Yes, she is wearing the t-shirt she slept in. She had an outfit picked out the night before - but when it came down to it - she just HAD to wear this shirt. You pick yer battles....ya know.

She was very serious when we entered the classroom. She wanted to get right to work on the activity sheets that were waiting on her desk.
After a quick hug and kiss - I was out the door.....and didn't even cry until I was halfway down the hall. Bradley, Bryce, and I went to Chick-Fil-A to meet some friends to celebrate the first day of school. Some cried.....some clicked their heels.

The day rushed by and before I knew it - it was time to go get her. She got to pick what was for dinner that night....and of course - Meatloaf, couscous, and steamed carrots. What a funny kid. She got to eat off of the "You are Special" red plate.
We then celebrated a successful day of 1st grade with a 1st grade cake.....singing, "Happy First Day of First Grade To You......."

Bradley celebrated with "his dance".

Bryce enjoyed his first piece of cake....a little too much.

Bradley can't wait until next week to start preschool so we can repeat the fanfare for him. - And Yes, those are alphabet tattoos on his wrist. I let my kids go to the first day of school in their slept in T-shirts and I tatt out my 3 year old. CPS anyone?

We are so excited for Karah and all the ways that she will grow this year.

1st Grade is a huge deal.

Reader Discretion Advised

There is no shortage of laughter in our lives.


Last night, we had all gathered around the table for dinner - when Bradley decided the course the conversation would take. He stood up in his chair - grabbed his crotch and the following dialogue occurred:


Bradley: Mommy, I want you to rip my Peedie off and throw it down the drain!
Me: Why would you want me to do that?
Bradley: I don't YIKE my peedie - I want a new one!


(The moment had come. It was all my fault! I shouldn't have let him wear those stick on earrings. I shouldn't have painted his nails! Karah's headband that he wore from 18 months to 2 1/2 should have been taken away! The 20/20 special of gender confused children flashed in my mind.....it was coming......he wants a vagina!)


Me: (hesitantly) You want a new one?
Bradley: Yes - I want a HUGE one....like Daddy!

Me: (trying to control myself) Well, when you get bigger - your peedie will get bigger too. Someday you will have a big peedie.


(The entire time we were discussing "the item" of business - he had his hands on it - flipping it around.....one of the joys of boys).


Bradley: Look Mommy! It's getting bigger already!!!!!


(Tom dropped his fork - and whispers "I thought that wasn't supposed to happen until they are teenagers.) I didn't know who to laugh the hardest at.


This morning the first question out of Bradley's mouth was "Has it grown yet?"

Hopefully this is a short lived phase....shorter than the phase of him demanding to be called "Karah".


Regardless, our lives will continue on as usual. He will be able to paint his toes, wear stick on earrings and headbands as much as he likes. My entry in today's gratitude journal will read,

1. "I am thankful my son wants a big peedie."


2. "I am thankful I didn't circumcise my son. Then he would REALLY feel ripped off.

IF ONLY I WERE AN ORANGUTANG!

So.....I have lost some weight. Please indulge me in sharing a little conversation I had with a friend in the grocery store Saturday night.

Friend: Sarah! So good to see you! Have you lost a ton of weight?

Me: Thanks for noticing! As a matter of fact I have - about 50 pounds (I would have been able to say a higher number if I hadn't just eaten the state of Utah the week before)

Friend: Wow - that's great. I can totally see it in your face.

Me: Well you better be able to tell in my butt, too, or I am going to kill myself.

Friend: (Awkward giggle - doesn't know if she should say that she DOES notice my fat butt is smaller or not.......gently transitions to the ........"so anyway"......)

What in the heck are people thinking? Take note - all you thinner folk who think it is a compliment to tell someone who has literally worked their BUTT OFF that you can see it in their face........just keep your stinkin' mouth shut. In fact, it would be better to say nothing than to say THAT!

This conversation has left me with a few questions:

1. exactly HOW FAT was my face before? Did I really have a 50 pound double chin?

2. How huge is my butt still? Is it so fat that dwarfs the rest of my body and makes my face look thin? Losing 4 pant sizes shows up in my face?

3. Why must a body part be named? Anyone who has lost weight can tell you that someone always has to tell you where they "can totally see it".

4. Why are people stupid?

5. When I hit my 100 pound mark - will people STILL bring up my face - or it will it be blatantly ridiculous........

If nothing else - this conversation has inspired me more than ever to keep on truckin' and lose the rest of the weight - if only to conduct this social experiment. I WILL keep you all posted as to how comments change as the total loss increases.

Until then.......I challenge you to go out and get real with someone. Say it.

"I can totally see it in your butt!"

Not your typical sabbath morning....

Right before church this morning, Bryce got his little fingers pinched in the door. Tom decided to stay home with him and ice his fingers and let him nap. I forged ahead with the other kiddies. It wasn't the most reverent of mornings....I took Tom's truck and we played 50's music loudly - with the back cab windows rolled down. I thought I better squeeze some "spirituality" in and briefly turned it down to talk to the kids about how much God loves us because he gave us the grass, the birds, and the trees.

They quickly agreed that they were loved and told me to turn up "1-2-3 O'clock". We pulled into the parking lot and hopped out. All of the sudden I heard a gasp from Karah - and she said,"Um, Mama.....somebody ran over one of Heavenly Father's Birds."

To the right there was a freshly annihilated cardinal. I tried to divert their attention and as we were walking away she said, "That bird was from Mexico". I said, "No, that was a cardinal."

She quickly corrected me. "No, Mommy. It was from Mexico. It was FULL of refried beans!"

Several times throughout the meeting I had to stop myself from bursting into laughter just thinking about it.

Anyone think I should submit that story to "The Friend" magazine?

LAST MINUTE PRIMPING

A girl has to have good looking nails the first day of class! She opted for hot pink nails to match her pink earrings. Bradley also opted for the hot pink nails :) Later that week he went and ate lunch with Karah at school. A boy on the playground cornered him and said, "Why do you have your nails painted????" Bradley, secure in his masculinity, said, "Why YOURS nails NOT painted?"

Bryce was rather amused by all of it.

Twas the Saturday Before 1st Grade.....

Karah, Bradley, and I headed to the mall to pick up a couple more back to school outfits before the big day came. On the way there she asked if she could get her ears pierced for 1st grade. I told her to call her Daddy and ask - and I believe his words were "Sure! Do it today!"
Tom and I were both on the same page with this one. We both had agreed that this was her choice to make and when she really, really wanted to - it would be okay with us and we wouldn't make her wait until a certain age. She had been talking about it for some time.....but this was the day that she truly showed the desire.


We went back home to pick up Tom and Bryce, so they could be part of the milestone.

She was so brave!

Bradley look on with fear and intrepidation. He actually begged to have his ears pierced too - but he eventually settled on stick-on earrings.

Bryce was as patient as ever.......just kicking back in the

crumb infested car seat...... until the show was over.

She opted for the 24 karat gold, pink, Cubic Zirconia. The real deal is still a long way down the road.

She was a supah-stah! If you have any little girls that are BEGGING to get their ears pierced....feel free to share the following footage - if wanting to dissuade.

And yes - that woman DID pierce her rubber glove to the back of Karah's earring. GO minimum wage!!!!

Tom has pinched the kids earlobes since they were little babies - and he says, "What is that?" and the kids always respond, "Daddy's little nugget."

When Tom tucked her into bed that night he pinched her earlobe and asked the usual question - to which she answered, "An earring in Daddy's little nugget!"

I hope he does that until she is 35!