My skunk-mobile covered in cat vomit. It was actually worse than shown in the pic - this was AFTER a clearing of the windshield. The windshield had a vomit span approximately 3 inches x 9 inches. It was a long path of vomit that came directly down the middle of the windshield.I was running out the door to attend Parents Day at Bradley's preschool. Tom was already at the school waiting for me to arrive. I got in the car and turned on the wipers - trying to clear the vomit - and it spread everywhere. I could hardly see out of the windshield. I was gagging and dry heaving as the smell came through the vents. I kept spraying the washer fluid while I was driving down the road - so it then blew the vomit all over my driver's side window. I pulled up to the school and parked in the very back where nobody would see me.
After I was finished, I went through the drive thru of McDonald's and no, I did NOT get a biscuit. It was a fruit and yogurt, I'll have you know. I thought if my window was down, they wouldn't notice the vomit. Well, the guy at the drive thru window looked towards the top of my car and looked extremely disturbed. I didn't think another thing about it until I got home and realized there was a HUGE pile of the vomit on the top of my car. 
When I got home I had the intention of getting the car cleaned BEFORE I had to return to pick Bradley up. Well, I got carried away removing wallpaper and ran out of time. I rushed to the school - and parked right by the front door, hoping I could grab Bradley and get out of there before anyone saw us.
Well, class was late letting out - so I waited in the hallway as the parents filed in. Another mother said to one of her friends, "Did you see that van out there that is covered in something?" The friend replied, "YES! That's cat vomit. I live on a farm....I know my animals."
I had two options. Pretend the car wasn't mine and walk home.....OR fess up. So - I interrupted and said, "Yeah, that vans mine. God doesn't love me anymore." They laughed and wanted to go out and see it, which I found most sickening.
I guess it was a good ice breaker. Made a couple of new friends.
Well, I took Bradley to Subway for lunch and parked the skunk/puke mobile in the front. I laughed the entire time I was inside, watching people walk by with disgust on their faces.
After lunch I tried to hose it off. I already had the beginning of a crack in my windshield - so when the cold water hit the hot windshield - the crack spread to the other edge. The vomit would not budge because it had baked on in the sun. Courtney proved her love and went after it with a paper towel. She is so much more of a woman than I. She got the chunks - but the smearage on the window wasn't going anywhere.
We picked Karah up for school and headed straight for the car wash. Got there and realized they didn't take cards today - so had to drive to the bank to get cash. We waited in line, withdrew the cash and I opened my console to put my money in - and FOUND a wad of money I forgot was in there. By the time we got back to the car wash there was a huge line.
We eventually got our turn - paid $8 to be de-vomitized.....so you can imagine my joy when I got home and found this: 
Even after the high pressure wash, triple shine protectant, triple pass rinse - the cat puke twas unscathed. Maybe it has nine lives, too.
My Odyssey, that I was once so proud of, has been through the humility ringer. The windshield is cracked, it's been sprayed by a skunk, and vomited on by a cat. All that is left in Heaven's bag of tricks is a hubcap incident.
I am going to be taking a serious look at my life and the energy that I am putting out in the universe. Maybe a little Yoga and meditation will be required to clear this bad Karma....because as it stands now - I am emitting some kind of fecal boomerang.
Any suggestions for clearing this bad energy would be most appreciated.
Maybe an enema would help?
ReplyDeleteIt's a high possibility that the cat's vomit was induced by the stench of skunk. And YES, Kasey - that cat is ours. It is an "outside" cate - but we own it. And I wish someone could tell ME what I did to deserve all of this!
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